Table of Contents
Part I GETTING IN AND CAMPUS LIFE.1 An Introduction to Boyfriend University.
2 How to Use This Book and Why You Should.
3 Financial Aid and Administrative Offices.
How to Have a Firm Handshake.
How to Shrug Off a Loss.
How to Make Conservative Investments.
How to Negotiate a Discount on Anything.
How to Reach a Compromise.
How to Stay Organized.
How to Deal with Mergers and Acquisitions.
How to Deal with Men and Loans.
How to Act with Authority.
4 Counseling Services.
How to Feel Daring and Successful without a Man.
How to React to Gunfire.
How to Turn an Ex-Boyfriend into a Friend.
How to Know If He's a Fixer-Upper and Worth Keeping.
How to Know Your Boyfriend University Type: The Quiz.
Where to Meet a Man, Particularly the Right Man.
5 Leaving Home and Living on Your Own.
How to Guess Why Your Car Won't Start.
How to Control a Skid.
How to Jump-Start a Car.
How to Drive a Full-Size Truck.
How to Have the Basic Tools You Need to Fix Anything.
How to Properly Pound a Nail.
How to Fix a Clogged Toilet.
How to Kick In a Door.
How to Make an Easy Pie.
How to Cut an Onion.
How to Carve a Turkey.
How to Slurp an Oyster.
How to Barbecue Anything.
How to Make Killer Spaghetti Sauce.
How to Kill Your Own Food.
Part II FINDING YOUR MAJOR.
6 Art and Cultural Studies.
How to Have Fun.
How to Mix a Martini.
How to Choose a Bottle of Bourbon.
How to Drink Cognac.
How to Bluff and Flatter.
How to Make Any Gift Fraught with Meaning.
How to Wear Men's Clothing (and Why You Should).
How to Procrastinate.
How to Fake Your Way to a Clean House.
How to Talk about Wine without Knowing a Thing about It.
How to Win an Award.
How to Smoke a Cigar.
How to Get a Tattoo You Won't Regret.
7 Communications Studies.
How to Talk about Yourself.
How to Feign Interest in a Much Younger Date.
How to Understand Obscure Literary References.
How to Be a Team Player.
How to Use the NATO Phonetic Alphabet.
How to Get to the Point.
How to Talk about Yourself Again.
How and When to Call Men.
How to Cry Like a Guy: The Crying Game.
8 Biology and Chemistry.
How to Hide Bad Behavior.
How to Accept Pleasure.
When to Sleep with a Guy.
How to Avoid Getting Used in a Relationship.
How to End a Relationship.
How to Peacock: Displaying Your Assets.
How to Check Him Out Like He Checks You Out.
How to Pick Up a Guy.
How to Move from Man to Man in the World of Hookup Dating without Bitterness.
Cheat Sheet: Sex Rules and Information—from Kissing to Foreplay to Fantasies.
Part III EXTRACURRICULARS.
9 Studying Abroad.
How to Breeze through Security.
How to Explore a Foreign City and Find Your Way Back to the Hotel.
How to Fathom a Street Grid.
How to Find the North Star.
10 Spring Break and Summer Vacation.
How to Plan the Perfect Weekend.
How to Pack a Car for a Long Trip.
How to Get Along on the Open Road.
How to Be Brave When Necessary.
How to Know If You Should Pack an Umbrella.
How to Pitch a Tent.
How to Light Up the Sky.
How to Draft a Fantasy Football Team.
How to Play Beer Pong.
How to Play Ultimate Frisbee.
How to Hike to the Top of a Big Mountain.
How to Play Poker.
How to Throw a Punch.
Index.
